Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Issue 75 (2013-2014)

Issue 75 (December 16, 2013)

Sidebar
Dear Ms. Roche,
I don’t like Bishop’s because I get beat up at school when I’m trying to get my popsicle like those kids at La Jolla High that go to Rigo’s. Even though I don’t like popsicles because they drip all over my hands because your campus is way too hot for me, I still get in the line of sweaty people and emerge with bruises and permanent scars. The mix of pushing, shoving, and name-calling that occurs in those Fun Friday frozen treat lines is exactly the type of bullying Mr. Chang warned us about in his presentation. And, Ms. Roche, how dare you allow those seniors to play country music? Do you have any respect for people like myself who don’t think Luke Bryan is a total babe? You are very cunning, trying to reward students for their hard work with time to relax, listen to music, and relieve their stress. But I see past your base scheming. It is all a plot to make us miserable. Ms. Roche, stop being nice to us because  everything is your fault. And let me wear spaghetti straps and sport a bare midriff, for goodness’ sake. Bishop’s sucks. Oh, and so does the Dungeon. They never go to any games or do anything.
Sincerely,
Dan Forssman


Articles

 A Response

Now, before I reply to the article written on Friday I want to make a couple things clear. First, I’m not attempting to be condescending or rude. I simply have an opinion about the article that I’d like to convey. Second, I understand what the intention of the article was, but I believe that it was poorly executed and was unintentionally hurtful to certain parts of the Bishop’s community.
I first read the article in Mr. Mulgrew’s English class. We discussed the contents and came to the conclusion that, again, while we understood the intent, it came off as sarcastic in an unkind way. Calling this campus “foodless” was probably the point that I was most upset about. The kitchen staff comes in every morning to the cold and loud “Dining Pavilion” to make food of a high quality for almost 1000 people. Most schools don’t have the kind of luxuries ours does with the burrito bar, soup of the day, daily fresh salad, sandwiches, etc. Also, talking to Ms. Roche in that manner was pretty disrespectful. She does more than you can even imagine for this school and for us to be happy here.
As for the attack on Fun Fridays, I can’t see how that is a legitimate argument. Fun Fridays are something our school sets up to make us happier. They are purely for our enjoyment. No one is obligated to set up Fun Fridays, and by the same token, no one is obligated to participate in them. Also, when you are a senior, feel free to blast whatever music you would like. But for now, while my class is applying to college and getting through midterms, we should be allowed to play whatever type of music we want (being, of course, appropriate and not even that loud)
Free dress, I understand, is accompanied by a dress code. But let’s be real here. For the past few weeks, I, at least, have been as cold as an Egyptian after the first snow in 112 years. And even if I could wear whatever I want, I would rather wear my jeans and hoodie than shorts and a tank top. Also, I really doubt we are deficient in Vitamin D here in sunny San Diego when it is the middle of December and, looking outside right now, I can’t see a cloud in the sky.
I could start a rant now on how there are children in Africa who would love your sticky drippy popsicle, but I’m sure everyone has heard of this argument before. It is true though. We are so privileged here that if all you have to complain about Bishop’s is the free dress, popsicles, and music, it’s probably a pretty darn great school. And it is.
I do commend the author of the piece for writing such a bold article, and I really hope this response does not make her stop questioning authority because that’s one of the most important qualities a person can have. But just be sure that the actions you are questioning are actually well worth your time and theirs.

Your fellow “oppressed” student,
Noor Hamdy ’14 The Voice of the Offended


This message is approved and supported by the Senior Class.



Friday, December 13, 2013

Issue 74 (2013-2014)

Issue 74 (December 13, 2013)

Sidebar
Happy Fun Friday the 13th. While running away from Jason Voorhees at an abandoned lake camp you can think about how much nicer a sunny ice cream lunch with country music in the background would be.


E
X
A
M
S


It helps to jumble the letters around and think about what comes after exams. (E)X-mas

Articles

Fun Fridays

Dear Ms Roche,

I would like to commend the ASBC for organizing “Fun Fridays” for all of the hard working students at The Bishop’s School.  These fun-filled days occur way too often. How generous it is for the administration to give the student body the gift of free dress, music and ice cream once every two months.

Free dress days are the greatest. And having to abide by the school’s dress code anyway makes it so much easier to choose your attire. For this we thank you.  Who needs to wear shorts, three inches above the knee, when you can wear jeans on a hot sweltering day? And, tank tops? Why bother.  Covering our shoulders is a much better idea.  We would not want to get too much of that pesky vitamin D into our bodies. Even though the medical community is concerned that most of the population has a vitamin D deficiency, it is nice to see that the administration knows better.

Having music to listen to is a nice touch. Country lyrics blaring so loud your eardrums bleed is very relaxing. With the seniors guarding the boom box with military conviction it's just like being at a concert.  It would be utter madness to allow the students to listen to music they actually wanted to hear.  The administration thinks of everything.

Finally, the ice cream, the most important part of our beloved “Fun Fridays.” Before “Fun Fridays” I had no idea that a popsicle was considered an ice cream.  Instead of enjoying a delicious bowl of chocolate chip ice cream, we get to have a sticky, drippy popsicle that stains your clothes, hands and face.  It is so much fun being crushed by a sweaty mass of people fighting to get a frozen treat on this foodless campus. The pushing, shoving, and name-calling reminds me of my sister and I.  This type of closeness really brings us together as a community.  Very commendable Ms. Roche you are very cunning.

In conclusion I want to thank you, Ms Roche, once again for bringing us “Fun Fridays.” I cannot imagine my Bishop’s experience without the identically dressed children in free dress, the blaring country music that I am learning to tolerate, or the bruises and permanent scars I have earned to get my delicious popsicle.

Your grateful pupil,
           
Hailee Silva ‘17 Queen of Enthusiasm

Issue 73 (2013-2014)

Issue 73 (December 12, 2013)

Sidebar
Review Week
Has begun! Time to review all the work we’ve done in the first semester, and, more often than not, attack the teachers every time we are met with even the slightest hint of an assessment or assignment.

ILANA IS THE BEST
According to my calculations, Ilana has now been featured in this publication more times than several staff writers.

In Other News…
CHRISTMAS CONCERT WOOT WOOT! This weekend! Saturday and Sunday! Take some time off from studying and relax and listen to the Bishop’s Singers and Bel Canto and Women’s Chorus and Knight’s Chorus and Middle School choirs serenade you with holiday songs! Saturday at 5:00 and 7:30, Sunday at 2:00.

Lyrics Quiz (Holiday Themed!)
It’s that time of year
When the world falls in love
Every song you hear
Seems to say
Merry Christmas, may your new dreams come true

Tina Fey Quote of the Day but Also Word of the Day at the Same Time
“I was a little excited but mostly blorft. "Blorft" is an adjective I just made up that means 'Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.' I have been blorft every day for the past seven years.” 

HAVE A VERY BLORFT DAY EVERYONE
IT OK DON’T BE CRY


Articles

The Doctrine
By: Leo Li (Frighteningly Passionate)
                CONFLICT IS WHAT MAKES US IMMORTAL. We are put down in history for what we have done, not for what we aspire to do. Opposition spurs us to become stronger in our beliefs and face each other in the climax of brinksmanship, only to be appeased by compromise (or victory), waiting for another bloody battle to be recorded in the textbooks of the world.
                I write this manifesto today to address the ever-escalating conflict between the DU and the Tower. Hypocrites and traitors make up the battle lines that we have
drawn against our enemies. In our ranks hold those who believe that we may make
peace with the enemy through peace and brotherly love.
                To them I say this: how many of our brothers and sisters have fallen before
the enemy? Shall we throw away the lives that were Eamon, Jack, and Thomas,
who fought for hegemon of the DU? IT IS TERROR THAT PRODUCES THE BEST
OF US ALL. What has peace ever given the nations of the earth? It was bloodshed
that created the greatest of epics, the most famous of men. What has peace ever
accomplished, which can only boast the weakness of peoples and the cowardice of
their leaders?
                THERE CAN BE NO HERO, NO VICTOR, WITHOUT ITS OPPOSITION. Who is George Washington, without the tyranny that was the British? Who was Martin Luther, without the corrupt indulgences of the Catholic Church? THE ANSWER, MY SCHOOL, IS NOTHING. Let this escalation of conflict with the DU and the Tower reach its full potential; let it produce the greatest of writers, the mightiest of orators. May those so seek to restrain its might be pushed away and forgotten in our
memory!
                Let those who read these words seek to live by these them; make antagonism your blood, dissention your breath. IT IS BY DESTINY AND DESIGN THAT PROGRESS IS THE CHILD OF COMPETITION. Only when the ink has been exhausted and our ability put to their final test, can we say that greatness was
achieved in these fields of war.

The Great Paradox of Life
By: Ilana Stone (Is Awesome)
My Bishopian brethren and sistren, it seems we’ve been sucked into a paradoxical vortex of conflicting information. Teachers preach the indispensability of sleep, yet we’re conditioned to believe that not doing homework is the eighth deadly sin.
We go home, open the assignment page and snapThe Whip has struck again! Like a cheap infomercial, our hours of classes come with a bonus deal of hours of homework.
As we do our homework, it grows late and we reach our dilemma. Surely the teacher wouldn’t mind if we decided to rest. Incorrect! “You need to work on your time management,” your teacher says the next day.
Time management? If I wake up at 6:00 a.m. I should be asleep by 10:00 p.m. Of the sixteen conscious hours, seven belong to the administration. One hour following these seven is the drive home then, art or sports for the next hour-plus to build a resumĆ©. Two hours with the family (a small reward for enduring yet another day without a mental breakdown). Then, check assignments. All academic classes meet tomorrow, and that should be about five hours of homework… except it’s not. For each assignment to display a student’s full potential work must be impeccable which takes even more time so much more time that none is left.  You have to go to sleep now to attain the minimum amount of sleeptime. None of my time is mine to manage.
                It’s not a life, it’s a regimen, and what’s needed isn’t time management: it’s a bucket of toxic waste to transform us into non-sleeping, workaholics. We are pressured to create masterpieces every night at the expense of our well-being (academic and physical). We are told we need sleep, but shamed when we take it. We’re trapped in a spiral with no safe escape.

Issue 72 (2013-2014)

Issue 72 (December 11, 2013)

Sidebar
Moment of Silence










































Thanks Mandela

For your service to South Africa and the world, and for helping me fill up this sidebar.

Articles

Just Take My Homework
By: Ryan Hastings

            I do not mind staying up late to complete assignments. I understand that we have to write essays, complete projects, and do other fun stuff once we get home. It’s all part of school. Part of the Bishop’s experience is being awake at two in the morning and screaming at your stuffed animals to shut up so that you can focus on what you are doing.  However, if I stay up late doing an assignment, I expect it to be collected the day it is due. 

            The worst thing ever, even worse than punching the straw through the Capri-sun, is when you get to class after slaving over that essay you procrastinated on for four hours the night before, living on Swedish Fish from twelve to two, is to hear your teacher say “I’m not going to collect it today.”  It makes me want to walk up and take a nap on the teacher’s desk to demonstrate the sleep that they cost me.  And hearing all the stories of people who didn’t finish the assignment because they were “too tired” and just got lucky…agony.  I’m not going to lie; I do occasionally benefit from these pushed back due dates, but more often than not they just amount to stolen sleep. It is not fair to us students when assignments get pushed back at the last minute. This is not necessarily an epidemic at Bishop’s right now, but it is something that happens every once in awhile. So for future reference, just like most students do, teachers need to stay true to their due dates and take our work when they say they will – no surprises.  Unless that surprise is a cancellation of finals, we’ll take that.

Add Me on Snapchat Obama
By: Dan Forssman

Yesterday, at Nelson Mandela’s funeral, Obama made some interesting choices. First, he shook hands with Cuban President Raul Castro, which John McCain naturally likened to shaking hands with Hitler, a perfectly reasonable analogy. However, I am here to talk about a different issue: Selfies.

Just when I thought selfies had been lost in the freshmen girl Instagram archives, Obama decided that it was time to bring them back. He posed for a selfie with British Prime Minister David Cameron and Denmark's Prime Minister Helle Thorning-Schmidt. Yes, during the funeral of world icon Nelson Mandela. And as Obama snapped his selfie, Michelle looked less than pleased to his right. I think she was jealous of the attention Barack was giving to Thorning-Schmidt because at some point later in the funeral, Barack and Michelle switched seats. Michelle has to realize that if she isn’t putting out at a funeral, Barack has to go for option two.

Anyways, Obama’s stupid-looking face in the photo (is that libel?) tipped me off that it was for Snapchat. Probably sending Sasha and Malea a snapchat with the caption “#funeralselfies” or Bill Clinton one with “Lewinsky has nothin’ on this Danish babe.” Either way, what Obama did was rather childish. Of course, the [conservative] media will take to its sensationalist leanings and rip apart Obama on this issue. While I do not think harping on his selfie is necessary, I am interested in what his Snapchat username is, so that I can teach him a thing or two on how and when to take selfies. 

Issue 71 (2013-2014)

Issue 71 (December 10, 2013)

Sidebar
Nessa
Greg did not actually fire Nessa. The entire joke of the original article was that he is, in fact,  dating the editor of The Tower. In addition, Greg hopes that if Nessa is ever actually fired in the future, she will know that saying “no, I’d rather not be fired,” really isn’t an option.

Filner
Ex-Mayor of San Diego and King of  the Goblins, Bob Filner has been sentenced to 90 days of house arrest and $1,500 in fines. It’s good to know that we live in a world where assaulting 19 women  is on par with an illegal NFL hit.

Wrex the Halls
Why did it have to be on a school-night? Answer me that, 91x.

Exchange Rates Worth Noting
1American Dollar (USD)
0.7358 Euros (EUR)
120.25 Japanese Yen (JPY)
0.6105 British Pounds (GBP)
1.067 Canadian Dollars (CAN)
13.03 Mexican Pesos (MXN)
6.088 Chinese Yuan (CNY) 

Word of the Day
Multitasking

Poetry/Prose Quiz
One Christmas was so much like another, in those years around the sea-town corner now and out of all sound except the distant speaking of the voices I sometimes hear a moment before sleep, that I can never remember whether it snowed for six days and six nights when I was twelve or whether it snowed for twelve days and twelve nights when I was six.

Lyrics Quiz
Go to sleep, and when we wake up, Imma hit that thing again. Promise.
                   
Articles

Why People Should Have Tails
By: Chris Halter (Born Again Staff Writer)

Dear Bathroom Goer,

                I hope you are enjoying whatever you’re doing in the bathroom; while you’re doing what you’re doing, I invite you to imagine how much better this world would be if people had tails like dogs. I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking, “Jeez, the DU has really hit rock-bottom now...” But please, I beg you to take this invitation seriously.
                First of all, the world would be significantly more entertaining. Just imagine walking into your class the day of a test, everybody’s tails tucked between their legs. Even better, imagine the already crowded big-top being filled with people wagging their tails at the thought of the feast they are about to consume. In a world where humans have tails there would never be a dull moment. Added bonus, if you get bored you could just play with your tail.
                I can tell that I’m really starting to convince you, but there is more to my incredible theory. If people had tails you could always know how they are feeling; for example, because females tend to mask their true emotions with statements like, “It doesn’t matter,” or, “Really I’m fine,” you could instantly tell whether they’re being honest. Simply take a peek over their shoulder and you’ll be able to tell if they’re upset! The possibilities are endless.
                Now that you’re completely convinced I encourage you to talk to your doctor about your options for adding appendages to your body. It’s never been easier! The selection of plastic surgeons in the La Jolla area is second to none (except maybe West Los Angeles) so you’ll be able to find the surgeon that fits your needs.
Don’t waste anymore time, get a tail today!


With love,
Chris Halter

The Invention of Neck Pillows
By: Matthew Kerr (Sky Mall Historian)

I look incredible, muttered Jonathan Vanderbliss, a 37-year old man from Madison, Wisconsin. Suitcase in hand, Jonathan gazed upon his own fine reflection in the mirror of an airport bathroom, reminiscing about the adventure that is life. Just then, a man entered.
Sorry, I didnt know anybody was
The man stared at Jonathan, blank-faced, eyes widened, almost as if he were gazing into his soul.
Where did you get that?
What? Jonathan questioned. He looked around. I purchased this suitcase from Samsonite, if thats what youre asking.
No, the man shook his head. That.
Jonathan realized that he was not referring to the suitcase, but to something else. The man reached forward and grabbed an item off of Jonathans neck: A cushion of sorts. Curved, soft, plushy, the item was one of magnificent brilliance. The man was both perplexed and stunned, holding the object in his hands, slowly observing it, sniffing it, tears forming in his eyes. He held it above his head, the grace of God practically visible, divine hymns echoing, a strong and radiant light penetrating through the cracked ceiling tiles of the airport bathroom.
This is a holy creation, the man uttered, as a single tear streamed down his face. Jonathan casually grabbed the item from the man and nonchalantly spoke. Oh, I invented that. I call it a vertebrae cushion. I wear it on long airplane rides so my neck doesnt hurt.
The man looked stunned. Thats fascinating, he said. Incredible. Im amazed. It appears to be so comfortable. And you dont look stupid in it at all! Jonathan blushed. Sir, I dont know who you are, but I run an investment company. I would like to purchase this vertebrae cushion idea of yours for 25 billion dollars.
Jonathan was overcome with joy. Okay! he shouted.
The man took out 25 billion dollars cash from his satchel and began counting it. Hours later, Jonathan was swimming in a pile of dollar bills. The man finished counting the money.
There you are, Jonathan, he said. Well be in touch. Jonathan was stoked. The man began to exit the bathroom. Just as he opened the door, he abruptly turned around and leaned forward.
Just an idea; drop vertebrae cushion. Just call it: neck pillow. Its smoother. He exited, leaving Jonathan both a billionaire and a revolutionary. And so, the neck pillow came to be. 

Issue 70 (2013-2014)

Issue 70 (December 9, 2013)

Sidebar
Get Ready For Review Week
Woot woot. That means it's almost time for finals! Only a few titanic tests stand in your way now. I say titanic not because the tests are huge and count for 25% of your grade, but rather because they are going to end miserably and Leonardo Dicaprio will likely cry for you.

Here's a picture of a sunfish

Colin Garon
(Whose name rhymes with Golin Caron) would like to challenge Bessie Barnes to a sun duel.

DU Editor Matt Agrees With Nessa That fraternization should only take place between members of the same publication. Even so, all interactions should still be strictly formal in nature.

Last Friday Night
Was Winter Formal. You probably missed it because you were busy studying for finals, doing college apps or waiting in line outside the Bishop's cafeteria.

Lyrics Quiz
When Santa visits his Paesans
With Dominick he'll be
Because the reindeer cannot
Climb the hills of Italy

Poetry Quiz
No man is an island
Entire of itself
Each is a piece of the continent

A part of the main

Articles

A Refusal
By Nessa Garcia (Employment Status Pending)

                As I clicked “send” on the message of sincere words that I had for The Tower, I wondered what I was getting into. Surely, the Tower editors are our sworn enemies and I, as a DU editor, should be constantly bagging on them and criticizing their work. However, after I was offered a slightly wilted flower by a docile Dounia Sawaya in my APUSH class, I decided to actually read an issue to, you know, see what was happening on the opposite side of the battle front. To my horror, I realized that I liked the writing in that issue and feelings of praise bubbled up inside of me. I tried to keep them down, but after a day of self-repression, I came out and just said what I thought to be true. Emphasis on what thought to be true.
                Yet, after reading Greg’s feeble attempt to fire me because of my magnanimous action, I realized that Greg had an even darker secret…

GREG FEINER IS DATING A TOWER EDITOR.

                Praising one is one thing, but holding hands, laughing with, and—oh geez, how do I say this—potentially kissing Tower editor is another. Clearly, Greg is the one here who needs to pack up his forks. Did he think he could hide this sad truth from the world? Evidently not.
                Anna Shuster is a fine lady, but inter-publication dating is unacceptable. Such a relationship is detrimental to our school community and society overall. What if they start teaching about these kinds of relationships to our 6th grade? Imagine the consequences it would have on our future kids. It’s just not right.
                Thus, I conclude with a short, but firm response: no Greg, I will not resign. For all that it’s worth, I’m glad that you attempted to fire me, because it gave me the chance to expose your double life to everyone. In the words of a totally sane Kanye West, “You ain't got the answers!”.

Ocean Sunfish Are Awesome
By Bessie Barnes (Guest Writer and Sunfish Enthusiast)

Recently, a certain ASBC Vice President with a name similar to Golin Caron wrote an article about his hatred for ocean sunfish. However, I believe this glorious ocean sunfish, also called the Mola Mola, deserves your respect. Here’s why:
1)       They’re the world’s largest bony fish. I’d like to see you guys try to achieve an average adult weight of 2,200 lbs.
2)       They eat jellyfish. Awesome, right? How many other animals have stomachs that can digest those stinging nematocysts? Jellyfish thrive in warm, polluted waters, and we’ll need all the help we can get to curb their population as sea temperatures rise.
3)       They’re super chill, generally spending their days hanging out & basking in the sunlight at the sea surface.
4)       They have a hard life. Sea lions are known for ripping off the Mola Mola’s fins and using the bodies as Frisbees. They don’t need you calling them “floppy grey vertical sea pancakes.” Rude.
5)       It just shows how far Mother Nature can push a design & still call it a fish.
6)       They’re friendly! Sunfish can be very curious and will often approach divers.
7)       They just look really cool. 

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Issue 69 (2013-2014)

Issue 69 (December 6, 2013)

Sidebar
R.I.P.
Nelson Mandela passed away yesterday at 95 years old. He was a great man and champion of civil rights, both in his native South Africa and in the world. Because of him, this world is a better place.

Complaints
If you have any grievances or complaints about any of the content of this fine publication, we’d love to hear about it from your mouth, not the grapevine. Thanks.

Formal
Today’s the day! Hope you all ordered your corsages and boutenirrres! If not, you may want to get on that.

Jokes of the Day (Brought to You By Thomas Higginson
What do you call a nosy pepper? 
JalapeƱo business

What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?
Nothing, but it let out a whine

Juxtaposition
Kevin Hart (5’3”) will be acting opposite LeBron James (6’8”) as his brother in an upcoming comedy. Get excited.

Sun Animals
After Colin’s scathing attack on the admittedly less-than-attractive sunfish yesterday, I shudder to think at what he will say about sunbirds.

Lyrics Quiz
Oh Santa,
I’ve been waiting’ on you.
That’s funny kid
Because

I’ve been coming for you.

Articles

Nessa, You’re Fired
By: Greg Feiner (Heartless Jerk)

At announcements on Wednesday, The Daily Urinal’s own Nessa Garcia decided it would be a good idea to acknowledge The Tower. She was wrong.

When I heard that the announcement was attributed to one of our own, my heart broke. My initial thought was “she’s off the staff,” but then I paused; perhaps it’s not that bad to appreciate the Tower. Maybe we should think of them as collegues and not rivals. Maybe their publication has different merits than ours and we as a school should recognize those merits more often.

Then I purposefully stepped on a Lego for even allowing such thoughts to enter my mind.

The Tower is our sworn enemy, the England to our Scotland, the U.S.S.R. to our U.S.A., the baking soda to our vinegar, the homework to our sleep patterns,  the Joker to our Batman, the Voldemort to our Harry Potter, the Newman to our Seinfeld, the Moriarty to our Sherlock Holmes, the Montagues to our Capulets.

They, with their monthly publication schedule and unfunny, “informative” articles have been trying to outdo us since the Daily Urinal’s inception. To interact with them in any way is unforgivable.

So, sorry Nessa, but pack your knives, get off the island, you’re fired.

Hopefully you understand, but we just can’t have someone that fraternizeswith any member of the Tower staff (our mortal foes) working on this fine publication, let alone someone who compliments their entire publication. Seriously, who does that? It’s a conflict of interest and we can’t have it.

Don’t worry, I have no doubt that you’ll be able to find another job.


 Thigh Gap
By: Adela Pfaff (Staff Writer)

“You’re pretty even though you don’t have a thigh gap.” is not a compliment.

“You’re so lucky you have a thigh gap.” is not a compliment.

“I wish I could eat as little as you.” is not a compliment.

“I wish I could eat as much as you.” is not a compliment

“Oh my god you’re so thin, you’re like anorexic!” is not a compliment.

“Aw, but I loved your long hair!” is not a compliment.

“You shouldn’t wear so much makeup.” is not a compliment.

“You should borrow my mascara, it'd look so good on you.” is not a compliment.

“Why did you dye your hair? It was so pretty before.” is not a compliment.

“I like your hair better when it's natural.” is not a compliment.

“I like your hair better when you straighten it.” is not a compliment.

“You’re so pretty even though you’re not skinny.” is not a compliment.

“I wish I were exotic like you.” is not a compliment.

“I wish I had the courage to wear a crazy outfit like you in public.” is not a compliment.

“It’s better to be curvy like you than skinny like her.” is not a compliment.

“It’s better to be thin like you than fat like her.” is not a compliment.

“I could break you in half!” is not a compliment.

“You should talk more, you’re always so quiet.” is not a compliment.

“Have you lost weight?” is not a compliment.

Although you may attack me for being “too PC,” what may be flattering in your ears could be insulting in another’s; take care when you compliment someone.