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Field Hockey CIF
In
possibly the hyphiest field hockey game of all time, Bishop's took home the W
in overtime on Saturday. Tina Huang decked a girl. Shout out to the ratchet
University City moms who tried to throw down with the Bishop's fans.
Chargers
After
yesterday’s loss to the Dolphins, Greg refuses to acknowlage that San Diego has
a professional football team.
Shorts!
Great
job to everyone in Shorts, particularly to Greg Feiner’s wonderful cast. All of
the DU Commanders either acted or directed. If you didn’t come, then I guess
you’ll be living the rest of your life full of regret, waiting to die alone!
The Tower
Congrats
to The Tower for coming out with its fourth issue! It’s on their blog if you want
to read it.
Breaking Bad
If
you haven’t watched the Malcolm In the
Middle alternate ending, do so. Yay science, B-word!
Jazz Band
Conor
Hayes might be the new, taller Michael Armstrong with his vocals and what not
(strictly speaking in terms of musicianship). Great job, Jazz Band!
Lyrics Quiz #1
Well,
you only need the light when it’s burning low,
Only
miss the sun when it starts to snow.
Lyrics Quiz #2
I’ve
been really tryin’ baby,
Tryin’
to hold back this feeling for so long.
Articles
Dear Urinal,
Do I have to
ask my formal date out in a public fashion?
-Formally
Confused
Dear Formally Confused,
Come this time of year, I hear a lot about these winter dance
proposals. Young lads come in discussing who to ask, who has and hasn't been
asked. It sure makes me a little misty. Back when I was a wee urinal, I had my
fair share of nerves. Those lady stalls are such babes. Of course dealing
with the societal pressure that we, as the gender without the uterus, have to
ask doesn't make it any less nerve wracking, we are implicitly obligated to do
the asking. (Lame, I know.)
Personally, I don’t believe that just because you ask someone
in public it shows you care more than the next guy. Sure you can be applauded
for the valor, but someone who does it in a more simple manner can care just as
much. It's cool that you wanted to make it known to the public but some equally
caring people simply aren't about that life. Also it’s fair to acknowledge the
fact that you're already thinking about asking someone shows you've got a pair.
I think what gets people is that they assume public translates
to “hey this person cares.” Too bad this translation of meaning carries a lot
of discrepancy. Look, as long as you don't ask in an if-you-say-no-I-will-sacrifice-your-first-born
or y-you're-my-last-resort manner, any method will be dandy.
If she/he rejects you solely due to the fact that you
didn’t ask publicly then you should reconsider what kind of people you’re
pursuing. Seriously, the person you ask should be flattered with ANY effort you
put into asking them. As long as you don't go up to your desired date with a
toolbox (unless that’s some sort of weird inside joke you two share), you'll be
good. I guarantee it.
Yours,
The Urinal
Our English Assignment Was To Turn Our Paper Into You Guys
By: Hailee Silva (Queen of Enthusiasm)
Little
Sally went to the movie theatre to watch We’re
the Millers, an R rated comedy she had heard a lot about, and was excited
to see. When she reached the ticket
window and politely asked for one ticket to the show she was turned away for being
15. Sally did not understand why she could watch the same content that is in an
R rated movie on prime time television, but not at the movies.
If
foul language, sexual innuendos, partially clothed individuals, or violent
activity can be viewed in the home by anyone, why not in a movie theater? With
the current lax of broadcasting rules of the FCC for network TV, the content of
an R rated movie is no different than what currently can be seen on primetime TV. If you have ever seen an episode of Two and a Half Men, or 2 Broke Girls, or Breaking Bad, you know exactly what I am talking about.
The
Classification and Rating Administration (CARA), a branch of the Motion Picture
Association of America (MPAA), which sets the standards for the rating system
of motion pictures, appears to be stricter than the FCC. A PG-13 motion picture
allows violence, nudity, sensuality, language, drug use, brief nudity,
depictions of violence yet draws the line at more than one expletive which
results in an R rating.
If the content of television programs are no
different than the content that can be viewed in an R rated movie, why can’t
Sally purchase a ticket? Sally will continue to be restricted to viewing PG-13
rated movies in theaters, that contains the same subject matter as an R rated
movie, until the CARA realizes they really are not protecting our teens from
anything they have not already seen.
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