Issue 16 (2013-2014)

Issue 16 (September 16, 2013)

Sidebar

Welcome Back!

Now that retreats and class bonding and fun are out of the way, it’s time to focus on what matters: schoolwork and never going outside ever again!!

CLUBS!

Club forms are due TODAY!!!! Fill them out!! Start a club! More importantly, start a club that will actually last through the entire year!

FOOTBALL

The Chargers won yesterday, which is cool. Good job Chargers. Sports!

SHORTS AUDITIONS

SHORTS SHORTS SHORTS!

Auditions for this year’s Shorts Festival are today, tomorrow, and Wednesday. Shorts are directed by the seniors in Acting Workshop and are super fun and super funny and a great experience.
Audition Times:
Monday in the Theatre 5:45-6:45

Tuesday in Geier Presentation Hall 2:45-3:45

Wednesday in Geier 2:30-3:45

AUDITION YOU NOODLES!

Lyrics Quiz Winners

The editor of Issue 15, who shall remain unnamed, did not post a lyrics quiz. Therefore, the editor of Issue 16, who is me, Colin Garon, has decided that everyone wins! Except of course, for the editor of Issue 15, who was lax and negligent. He shall be disciplined.

Today’s Lyrics Quiz

But i would walk 500 miles
And i would walk 500 more
Just to be the man who walked 5,000 miles
To fall down at your door

FUN FACT!!!!!!

It’s the 16^th today and the 16^th issue wow!!! How ‘bout them apples????

Articles

5 Gleaming Gems of Western Animation

By: Adela Pfaff (Big Dork)

I fawn over cartoon characters. I eat dinner alone. I tell my fish about my favourite cartoons. I am lonely. Please watch these shows and fawn over cartoon characters with me (or will at least know what I'm talking about).

1. China, IL: Brad Neely draws, produces, writes, and stars in this show. You may know him from his Youtube films, such as JFK, George Washington, and Sodom and Gomorrah. Look these up immediately. This show gets weird fast.

Characters I'd ask to prom: Pony, Steve, Frank.

2. Venture Bros: If you didn't receive the mass text from me about this show, your parents probably didn't give me your cell phone number after I called their work phones and asked for it. This show is my everything. I got Chad Bishop to watch this show. I watched every episode of this show in three days, and two days later I met the producers and stars (including Patrick Warburton, who voices Brock Samson, Kronk, and Joe Swanson). I cried. I met a 30 year old couple and talked to them about it in line for the autograph signing at Comic Con and weirded out my mom. We are friends to this day. Please watch Venture Bros. Protip: This is instant on Netflix.

Characters I’d ask to prom: Dean Venture, Pete White, Dr. Girlfriend, David Bowie, The Monarch.

3. Regular Show: Everything about this show is funny. The animation is beautiful and it's super original stuff. Plus this was supposed to be a show for adults, but it got sent to Cartoon Network instead. So there are subtle references to older people humour. Plus Tyler, the Creator guest starred! This show also follows a strict formula for each episode, try to figure it out. If you're still not convinced to watch, check out JG Quintel's "pilot" for the show, "2 in the AMPM" on YouTube.

Characters I’d ask to prom: Mordecai, Benson, CJ, Thomas.

4. Bob's Burgers: Much like Venture Bros and Archer, this show stars H. Jon Benjamin as Bob Belcher, the owner of a fantastic burger restaurant which, much like the show, hasn't gotten a lot of publicity. Erotic Friend Fiction. Protip: This is instant on Netflix.

Characters I’d ask to prom: Tina, Linda, Marshmallow, Andy and Ollie, the mannequin lover guy.

5. Gravity Falls: This show is genuinely really cute, and it's the only show on this list that doesn't tell you to watch with a parent or guardian over the age of 18 before the opening credits! It is about cute supernatural kiddos and their marvelous misadventures. Maddie Morales and I watch this show obsessively, and even spent like 3 hours decoding the ciphers in the title sequences. If you want to be radical coolio like me and Maddie Morales, watch this show please. Please.

Characters I’d ask to prom: Mabel, Grunkle Stan, Bill Cipher, Waddles, Dipper, Robbie, Wendy.

Be warned: the shows on this list (except for Gravity Falls and Regular Show) are all really NSFW (Not Safe For Work (or school)) and pretty adult. (But that's what makes them so funny don't tell your parents I said that). Anyway, if you have any questions about getting overly invested in dorky things or if you start watching any of these shows, email me at pfaffa@bishops.com. I'll write you a handwritten thank you letter if you tell me you've watched one of these shows to completion. Arigato/gomen.